Pissing On Portman

Hehe…It seems Natalie Portman is into “Water Sports” and a bit of sexual degradation and PETA, always fond of objectifying and denigrating women, was more than willing to make use of her.

Natalie Portman – Better Pissed On Than Pissed Off

Personally, I wouldn’t even piss on this scrawny, Leftist, vegan skank. That’s a personal opinion though and I’d prefer not to argue matters of taste with those who might feel differently about using Natalie Portman as a receptacle for various bodily fluids.

Challenge AcceptedBut, irrespective of one’s personal tastes and sexual perversions, Portman and PETA have given us the perfect response to- and reprisal for their long-time favorite tactic of throwing blood or paint on people.

Nothing could sum up Americans’ loathing for the rabble of PETA better than pissing on them.

Sure, piss-bombing these disgusting filth won’t be as damaging to personal property as using blood and/or paint. It is, however, much more poetic and much apropos if applied to celebrity PETA whores who are little, if anything, more than walking receptacles for fluids.

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O Christmas Frog

Well, that’s not something you see every day, or even every holiday season – the rare Christmas Frog. 😆

Christmas Frog - You just know that PETA will freak
Rana Tannenbaumensis – The Christmas Frog

The Christmas Frog (Rana tannenbaumensis) is rare these days due to religious and ideological destruction but can still be found in North America and Western Europe and was once part of Christmas celebrations.

O Christmas Frog, O Christmas Frog,
Your bellies glow delight us!
They’re warm when summer days are bright,
They’re warm when winter snow is white.
O Christmas Frog, O Christmas Frog,
Your bellies glow delight us!

OK, OK – It’s a tree frog that has swallowed a Christmas light, mistaking it for a firefly. 😛

Of course, if this pic goes viral, how long do you think it’ll be before PETA winds themselves up and starts protesting outdoor Christmas lights because of the potential for frog’s swallowing them? They’ll probably start a “Swamp Puppies” pseudo-education campaign reminiscent of their Sea Kittens propaganda.

So to preemptively strike and forestall any attempt by PETA to move in that direction, I present you with a sampling of the Swap Puppy:

Canis Palus – Swamp Puppies


NOTE: For those who might be interested, the frog in the image is a Cuban Tree Frog (Osteopilus septentrionalis) and the photo was taken in August, 2009 by James Snyder in his backyard in southern Florida.

After the photo Mr. Snyder pulled the light out of the frog’s mouth and he was fine, having suffered no ill effects from ingesting the light-bulb.

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UnHappy Meals

PETA is at it again and this time their “campaign” doesn’t possess the cuteness and humor of their ridiculous Sea Kitten marketing efforts. Nor is it yet another rendition of their perennial use of naked or nearly naked women and girls to shock and scandalize the public while playing on the prurient nature of Western culture.

This time PETA – or at least their cells in New York – has chosen to directly target young children in an effort to traumatize them and hopefully cause a psychological aversion reaction in them regarding McDonald’s.

PETA accosts and traumatizes young children with depraved images and fake blood in Unhappy Meals featuring Ronald McCruelty
PETA Targets Young Children For Trauma and Abuse

Despite understandable and proper outrage from American parents, the psychological terrorists and child abusers of PETA claim that children are jaded enough by television and video games to handle the “carnographic” images, and have sworn to continue their sick campaign.

From CBS 6 (WRGB), Albany, NY:

Activist group People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) will hand out “Unhappy Meals” to children at an Albany McDonald’s restaurant today to protest alleged chicken abuse, according to a statement this morning by PETA.

PETA alleges that McDonald’s allows its chicken suppliers to abuse the animals before they are slaughtered for food. The organization advocates “controlled-atmosphere killing,” a method that promotes animal welfare.

Children who buy meals at the McDonald’s at 391 Central Ave. today beginning at noon will encounter PETA staff, headed by an activist in a chicken costume.

The “Unhappy Meal” that PETA will give to children – a spoof of a Happy Meal – will include a “menacing, knife-wielding” Ronald McDonald cutout, a ketchup packet disguised as chicken blood, a plastic chicken covered in “blood” and a “McCruelty” t-shirt.

The statement indicates that PETA will target children so they will “join its campaign” to convince McDonald’s to change slaughter methods.

This time depraved vermin of PETA has gone to far. They seek to traumatize as many children as possible in order to further their agenda by scarring the minds of the children of Americans.

PETA vermin in chicken suits bleeds out murdered Ronald McDonald
PETA accosts children with THIS in some McDonald’s parking lots

In America we defend children from abuse and we punish the depraved vermin who seek to harm them and scar their minds. That’s something that PETA seems to have forgotten – if, being unaccustomed to such things in their own culture, they ever knew it in the first place.

I’m originally from the South. Down there we take these matters seriously and we don’t worry overmuch about what the law will say about the retribution we mete out to filth like these.

The problem now faced by American parents is that these abusers who are targeting American children are protected by the law. PETA is allowed by the current laws of the land to conduct these psychological terror attacks on American children. Parents seeking to defend their children against these depraved individuals have no legal recourse with which to do so.

Those who choose to abuse our children have turned away not just from America, but from Humanity as well. They are nothing but rabid vermin and must be recognized as such.

In this case our laws, over the years having been suborned from their proper intent, have failed America’s children. When the law has failed our children, the children of an America already in dire peril, what recourse is left to any of us to protect and defend our children from abusers like PETA? What means are left to us and how much courage and self-sacrifice does it take to use them?

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Sea Kitten Taxonomy

PETA, in their bottomless stupidity, ignorance – yes, they manage to be both somehow – and arrogance wants to re-educate America’s children. In an effort to twist the minds of America’s youths PETA wants to indoctrinate them into calling fish “Sea Kittens.” But, if the Liberals actually allow PETA’s agenda into the schools and classrooms of America, what will they teach our children? What exactly is a Sea Kitten?

Felis Marinus

Common Names(s):Sea Kitten, Oceanic Split Tail, Yummy Things

Felis Marinus is a family of sea creatures that encompasses a variety of individual genera and species. There is a great deal of variance in the physiognomy, not only between species but also between individual specimens of the same species.

In an effort to further our children’s “education” I’ve provided sample images of some of the more well established branches of the Sea Kitten family. Biology is part of America’s core curriculum after all. 😉

Not exactly NSFW, but I put the lesson in biology, taxonomy, and species identification after the break just in case.

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Eat More Pussy

mercat cartoon - not from PETAPETA has reached a new nadir in ridiculous behavior. PETA has decided that fish should be renamed “Sea Kittens” in order to indoctrinate children against eating them.

Our constitution guarantees their right to try anything of this sort that they wish to, but this idea exhibits a level of stupidity bordering on outright insanity.

In their own gibbering mouthings:

People don’t seem to like fish. They’re slithery and slimy, and they have eyes on either side of their pointy little heads—which is weird, to say the least. Plus, the small ones nibble at your feet when you’re swimming, and the big ones—well, the big ones will bite your face off if Jaws is anything to go by.

Of course, if you look at it another way, what all this really means is that fish need to fire their PR guy—stat. Whoever was in charge of creating a positive image for fish needs to go right back to working on the Britney Spears account and leave our scaly little friends alone. You’ve done enough damage, buddy. We’ve got it from here. And we’re going to start by retiring the old name for good. When your name can also be used as a verb that means driving a hook through your head, it’s time for a serious image makeover. And who could possibly want to put a hook through a sea kitten?

Sea Kitten Campaign

Thankfully our constitution also guarantees people like me the right to mock and ridicule the potentially dangerous lunatics at PETA. I say “potentially dangerous” because, it’s possible that these nutjobs could manage to achieve some of the ends to the detriment of civilized people everywhere. True, it’s highly doubtful since nobody with a functioning set of prefrontal lobes thinks of PETA as anything other than useful source of picture of naked celebrities, but it could happen and campaigns meant to brainwash our children are possibly PETA’s best chance at achieving their agenda.

So, to take a page out of PETA’s own playbook, let’s conflate sex with the topic at hand. This will serve the dual purposes of gaining a great deal of attention and making the Sea Kitten topic unsuitable for children in the minds of society. My outline of the basic concept of the counter-campaign reside below the break. It is NSFW.

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