Archive for August, 2010

Tiger Woods’ Divorce

Posted in Humor, Society on August 28th, 2010

Tiger Woods and Rachel Uchitel - This was surprising?As far too many people know and, for reasons that defy logic, seem to care, Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren have divorced after the world found out that Tiger had cheated on her with a laundry list of men and women.

Apparently Elin Nordegren had a problem with being married to a serial pervert.

Of course, one of society’s biggest “concerns” was what the divorce settlement would be. So far there are no firm details about how much Tiger is actually going to end up paying for the skanks, whores, and “male escorts” he frequented for years, but some rumors are available.

From the Onion Sports Network:

Former super-couple Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren are making it official with one of the highest-profile divorces in sports. Here’s how it will work:

  • Couple will evenly split 8-foot-tall pile of money in the spare bedroom
  • Joint custody of the caddy
  • Woods required to hire cleaning company to remove skank juice from living room carpeting
  • Elin is entitled to half of Tiger’s collection of strap-ons, double dildos, leather handcuffs, feather ticklers, nipple clamps, vibrating cock rings, pleasure wands, Fleshlights, anal plugs, cock slings, and Rim Raiders
  • Tiger Woods will keep all of the $178 million in cash he stashed in an offshore account in anticipation of just this sort of thing
  • Couple will have shared custody of the children, with Woods seeing them every other decade
  • Tiger gets the couple’s Ford Festiva
  • Elin is now the face of Gillette Mach 3 razors

I really don’t have any sympathy for Elin Nordegren though; she had to know that this sort of behavior by Tiger was unavoidable. The brutha golfed! A Hole in One was bound to turn into “a hole in dat one, and dat one, and dat one … Damn! I gots to get me into all of ’em holes.” 😛

Related Reading:

Perverts and Predators: The Making of Sexual Offending Laws (Issues in Crime and Justice)
Celebrity in Death
Detention of Doom (DC Comics: Secret Hero Society #3)
The Humor Code: A Global Search for What Makes Things Funny
Flapper: A Madcap Story of Sex, Style, Celebrity, and the Women Who Made America Modern

This Is How I Feel

Posted in 2010 Election, Humor on August 27th, 2010

This is how I feel about the state of the government most times these days. It’s funny and depressing at the same time.

demotivational posters - ARE WE THERE YET?
Are We There Yet? Is It November Yet?

Can we just get to the 2010 Congressional Midterm Elections, kick these jackasses out of office, and maybe, just maybe, get on with the business of restoring some measure or vestige of sanity to America?

Related Reading:

The People vs. Barack Obama: The Criminal Case Against the Obama Administration
Congress Reconsidered Eleventh Edition
Live Right and Find Happiness (Although Beer is Much Faster): Life Lessons and Other Ravings from Dave Barry
Slavery by Another Name: The Re-Enslavement of Black Americans from the Civil War to World War II
Act of Congress: How America's Essential Institution Works, and How It Doesn't

Classically Hot

Posted in Music, Society on August 27th, 2010

What do you get when you combine beautiful, talented women from Australia, England, and Wales? In this case you get the hottest string quartet to hit the charts in history, bond.

Classically Hot – Bond’s Fuego

The string quartet, specializing in classical cross-over music, currently consists of Tania Davis from Australia, Eos Chater from Wales, and Elspeth Hanson and Gay-Yee Westerhoff from England. Above is the video for their new single, Fuego from their album, Shine.

Enjoy! I know I did. 😀

Related Reading:

Over in Australia: Amazing Animals Down Under
Babe Ruth and the Baseball Curse (Totally True Adventures): How the Red Sox Curse Became a Legend . . .
A Taste of Wales: Discover the Essence of Welsh Cooking with Over 30 Classic Recipes Shown in 130 Stunning Colour Photographs
Australia (National Geographic Adventure Map)
The Betrayal Bond: Breaking Free of Exploitive Relationships