Happy Thanksgiving

Posted in Society on November 26th, 2015

Niki As IndianHappy Thanksgiving

To all my fellow Americans – I wish you a happy Thanksgiving. To the Liberals and Progressives – I leave you with the quandary of whether or not you can bring yourself to bitch about a Black immigrant dressed as an “Indian Princess.” 😛

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Speaking To Jihadis

Posted in Humor, Politics, Religion, Society on November 21st, 2015

Faisal Saeed Al Mutar’s Facebook post about a fictional conversation between a Jihadi and a Progressive is said to have gone viral:

It must be incredibly frustrating as an Islamic terrorist not to have your views and motives taken seriously by the societies you terrorize, even after you have explicitly and repeatedly stated them. Even worse, those on the regressive left, in their endless capacity for masochism and self-loathing, have attempted to shift blame inwardly on themselves, denying the terrorists even the satisfaction of claiming responsibility.

It’s like a bad Monty Python sketch:

“We did this because our holy texts exhort us to to do it.”

“No you didn’t.”

“Wait, what? Yes we did…”

“No, this has nothing to do with religion. You guys are just using religion as a front for social and geopolitical reasons.”

“WHAT!? Did you even read our official statement? We give explicit Quranic justification. This is jihad, a holy crusade against pagans, blasphemers, and disbelievers.”

“No, this is definitely not a Muslim thing. You guys are not true Muslims, and you defame a great religion by saying so.”

“Huh!? Who are you to tell us we’re not true Muslims!? Islam is literally at the core of everything we do, and we have implemented the truest most literal and honest interpretation of its founding texts. It is our very reason for being.”

“Nope. We created you. We installed a social and economic system that alienates and disenfranchises you, and that’s why you did this. We’re sorry.”

“What? Why are you apologizing? We just slaughtered you mercilessly in the streets. We targeted unwitting civilians – disenfranchisement doesn’t even enter into it!”

“Listen, it’s our fault. We don’t blame you for feeling unwelcome and lashing out.”

“Seriously, stop taking credit for this! We worked really hard to pull this off, and we’re not going to let you take it away from us.”

“No, we nourished your extremism. We accept full blame.”

“OMG, how many people do we have to kill around here to finally get our message across?”

Of course, as we all know, if this conversation were conducted in person there’s only one way it could end.

Allahu Akbar MetnakahAllahu Akbar Metnakah!

This would never happen though. Liberals and Progressives love telling us these things but I can’t really see them saying the same thing to the jihadis that they’re seemingly always engaged in apologetics for. This is probably a good thing because it would raise too many difficult questions – e.g., is it still terrorism if a Jihadi kills a Liberal or Progressive?

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Sweater Meat

Posted in Society on November 17th, 2015

With Autumn’s colder weather upon us, it’s time to consider a change in our diets. Sure, throughout the hotter months, a steady diet of bikinis is quite fine. They’re not going to get you through the Fall and Winter though. For that one should consider sweater meat.

Seasonal Sweater Meat

Like all delectables of the cooler months, sweater meat is very warming, so let the crisp air and glowing color of Autumn be your guide to fine and healthy dining.

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