Because …

Because … Nope! I Got Nothing
Because … Nope! I Got Nothing

And here we have a cute Asian Softbody, half-dressed on the beach with her saxaphone because … I don’t have a clue. Given the look on her face, the model also has no clue what going on or why it is.

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Your Bikini Body

This is not a Bikini Interlude. It has a purpose beyond mere prurient pleasure. It’s a discussion – read as lecture; I’m nothing if not pedantic – of- and about any and every woman’s bikini body.

Ladies, Your Bikini Body

Yes, it’s April, so we here in the Northern Hemisphere are approaching bikini season. Hence, we’re soon to be inundated with ads for “quick fix” weight-loss programs / products and with you all fretting about your bodies and bikinis – or really, any bathing suits whatsoever.

This Could Be Your Bikini Body

Maybe you have a slim, slender, and/or tight body that fits the mold that our society says is suitable for a bikini. If so, break out that bikini and strap your body into it. Few, though not none, will complain.

If you came by that body of yours naturally, luck you. Enjoy it and the pleasure it brings. If you’ve worked hard and stressed yourself out to get it, accept both my congratulations and condolences. You’ve certainly earned the privilege to enjoy yourself.

Or This Could Be Your Bikini Body

Maybe your body is toned and muscular. Maybe you’re a true hardbodied babe. If so, you’ve either gotten your body to look like that through hard work, intense body sculpting, or some combination of two. Few, if any of note, are going to complain about you in a bikini. Go out and enjoy yourself and the attention you’re sure to garner.

Or This Could Be Your Bikini Body

Or maybe –most likely, probably – you’ve got a curvy, phat, soft body, one that doesn’t meet society’s rather nastily enforced esthetic standards when it comes to wearing a bikini. That’s all good too. Fuck society and the expectations and demands it’s fallen prey to.

If you want to rock that bikini, do so! The haters are always going to find a reason to hate and the rest of us, who are either the increasingly less silent majority or the largest plurality, will either approve or just not care.

Ask Yourself Why, Ladies

Ladies, you should ask yourself why exactly you want to wear a bikini in the first place. Being goal orient is, after all, almost always the best way to go into anything.

If you’re looking for a sexual partner and planning on wearing a bikini to help attract one, then you’re likely to succeed irrespective of whether your body its, tight, hard, or curvy and soft. Men are varied and rarely absolute in our tastes and I’m told that women, if that’s your thing, are even more extreme in this. You’re going to, in all likelihood, get what you’re looking for and have a choice in partners.

On the other hand, if you’re planning on wearing a bikini just for yourself because that’s the bathing suit you want to wear for the purposes of tanning, comfort, or whatever reason, then who cares? In this case, it’s all about you and the attraction for- or approval of others really shouldn’t matter at all.

Ladies, in this case it is your body, your bikini, and your choice. Don’t be afraid of making the wrong choice because there isn’t one.

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Ice Princess

gqlewu2 Ice Princess
(Click to Enlarge)

It seem that not all ice princesses are frigid, nor are they all made of sharp angles and planes. Some seem to be both warm and delightfully soft. 😉

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Now That’s a Soft-Tail

Buffie Carruth - Soft-Tail
Now That’s a Soft-Tail

And here’s Buffie Carruth showing us all that, no matter which frame you choose, it’s possible and preferable to achieve the comfort and style of a soft-tailed ride. 😉

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Throw The Dog A Bone

In what I hope is delectable reprise of both a recurrent sentiment on Reflections From A Murky Pond and a previous article, allow me to reiterate that meat is for men and bones are for dogs.

Meat is for men; bones are for dogs
Curvy Girls Are Beautiful

So, if you so choose, throw the dog a bone and save the delicious, tender, meaty curves for yourself. It’s a win-win situation. The dogs will be happy – they eat cat shit after all – with the bones, and we men can enjoy the meaty curves that we so love without happy to hear their yapping.

Bones Are For Dogs; Meat Is For Men

And really! I can’t think of a better response to those dogs that bitch at men who love curvy women than to throw them a bone and say, “crunch it up, boy!” I’d say something similar about the complaints from those skinny bitches but throwing them to those dogs is a felony. 😉

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