This is definitely a case when it doesn’t really matter what you put in the pipe. The pipe itself is enough to beg the shocked and horrified question.
What The Fuck Are You Smoking?
Surgeon General’s Warning: Smoking Cthulhu may cause lung cancer, night-gaunts, mi-go, shoggoths, and the end of the world. It may also impair breathing and sanity.
Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn … of hot babes with octopus tattoos?
Yeah, it’s not every woman who can pull off an octopus chest tattoo. But, Cthulhu be Praised, this one can.
Cthulhu be Praised?
And because I tend to dislike and, therefor, avoid posting pic of women’s parts without their faces included, here’s a small sampling of Harliequinnx…
OK. I now return you to your normally scheduled morning. Please don’t think about any Elder Eldritch Horrors having erotic dreams about tattooed brunettes. :(;,;):
When one thinks of H. P. Lovecraft, if one does think of him at all, one thinks naturally of his Cthulhu Mythos. That’s unsurprising since Lovecraft is heralded as one of the greatest, if not the greatest, writers of horror fiction of the twentieth century and the Cthulhu Mythos was the centerpiece of his writing. Lovecraft, however, wrote more than just horror. He also published a journal heavily focused on sociopolitical thought, The Conservative.
H. P. Lovecraft’s The Conservative had little no nothing to do with eldritch horrors. It was a journal edited and self-published sporadically by H. P. Lovecraft between 1915 and 1923. Some of its pieces were written by Lovecraft himself, but many of them were written by others. They included not just political and social commentary on the issues of the day, but also poetry, short stories and literary criticism.
The period in time covered by The Conservative coincided with some of the most tumultuous events of the twentieth century, including the First World War and the Russian Revolution.
It’s quite the interesting read.
Note, however, that I said it was an interesting read. It is not an easy one; not at all. It is firmly grounded in the society, issues, and history of a century ago. Still, I wholeheartedly recommend it as an addition to any American’s library.
Here’s Wishing You An Eerie Christmas
A Lovecraft Christmas
To the tune of “‘Twas the Night Before Christmas” – With apologies to Clement Clarke Moore.
Twas the night before Yuletide and all through the hole
Not a creature was stirring, not even a Dhole
Aldebaren hung at the right place at nine
In the hopes that Great Cthulhu would come out this time
The Fungi from Yuggoth, all snug in their caves
Were plotting to turn all the people to slaves
The Deep Ones in Rlyeh, the Ghouls in their graves
Were dancing and singing and acting depraved
When what do my wondering eyes should appear
But a mouldering sleigh and eight corpselike reindeer
With a horrible driver so leprous and reeking
I knew right away that my fear was unspeaking
The reindeer were gross, as they flew up from hell
And It hoarsely whispered and chanted a spell
Ia Shub Niggurath! Cthulhu ftagn!
Nyarlathotep! I summon you on!
As decomposed flesh before the charnel stench rise
And meet with the open air polluting the skies
Up to the housetop the horror it rose
And the gangrenous odors assailed my nose
And then in a slopping noise heard on the roof
The lumbering clomping of octopoid hoofs
As I drew in my head and was turning around
The horror lurched into my room with a bound
Its eyes how they pulsate
So bulbous and gory
This blasphemous creature
So noxious and hoary
I was frozen by fear, my feet woudn’t run
I threw up my cookies, this wasn’t much fun
It whispered my name and said “You come with I”
I tried to refuse and it said “Then you die.”
It came at my throat with its grim claws extended
But a miracle saved its victim intended
I had three Elder Signs in a slot in the floor
It screamed with a fiendish sound and went out the door
It sprang to its sleigh, and its team gave a surge
And away they all flew to the sound of a dirge
I heard it exclaim as it flew out of sight
“You’re lucky this time, for the stars weren’t right.”
Hehe…Who needs Krampus when you’ve got Cthulhu Claus to revive the Elder meaning of the Winter Solstice?