Starbucks Running Scared

Starbucks Running Scared

Yes, I’m laughing my ass off in a paroxysm of schadenfreude over Starbucks permanently closing six stores in Seattle; six more in the Los Angeles area; two in Portland, Oregon; and one each in Philadelphia and Washington, D.C., due to their being unsafe to work at.

It seems that Wokeness isn’t so great for Starbucks’ employees who had to deal with high levels of street crime around and within their stores.

I guess the only real question is will the Woker Than Thou crowd who controls so much of pop culture today declare this a good thing due to De-Gentrification, or will they declare it as racist and White Flight.

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Crying At Starbucks

They're Crying At StarbucksYes, it’s true; Liberal Tears are quite common at Starbucks these days. Millennials especially are weeping into their overpriced and over-roasted coffee-esque beverages. The quiet sobbing and sniffling, punctuated by the occasional bouts of weeping, wailing, cursing, and the gnashing of teeth, has really changed the ambience of many Starbucks, most especially those in the Liberal and Progressive controlled coastal regions.

Not but what these people have great reasons to cry, twenty of the most common ones being listed below.

20 Reasons Millennials Are Crying At Starbucks

  1. There was a 10 minute wait for the Pumpkin Spice Latte
  2. The Barista didn’t use the proper gender pronoun
  3. Because President Trump is on the TV
  4. Because there are no safe spaces in the real world
  5. They took a Buzzfeed quiz that guessed their gender correctly
  6. They see someone wearing a #MAGA t-shirt
  7. Their parents called asking them to move out of the basement
  8. The guilt of supporting a free-market economy
  9. They accidentally swiped right on a Conservative’s profile
  10. Bernie still isn’t President
  11. Hillary still isn’t President
  12. Trump still is President
  13. They spilled coffee on their new “Che” t-shirt
  14. They saw an American flag and it wasn’t being stepped upon
  15. They found out what Socialism actually means
  16. They want to join ANTIFA but parents won’t let them
  17. They want to use violence to stop free-speech but can’t fight
  18. Couldn’t recall the difference between further and farther
  19. Whole Foods rejected employment application…yet again
  20. Wondering if that Liberal Art’s degree was actually worth it

Poor things – They were betrayed by reality which refused to abide by their wishes. Worse, they’ve spent their entire lives being taught that they were entitled to get whatever they want, whenever they want it. So now, they can’t cope with having lost everything.

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It’s October & That Means…

Deep-Fried Pumpkin Spice Latte
Deep-Fried Pumpkin Spice Latte

It’s October and in America that means it’s pumpkin spice everything. Also, since we dearly love to deep-fry just about anything, we now have Deep-Fried Pumpkin Spice Latte because….well, just because that’s how we roll in the US of A. 😉

Now the question is how do we incorporate bacon into this. Perhaps that will be answered soon.

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Chai-Hulud!

Hal Yawm! Chai-Hulud, called at times, “The Great Barrista,” demands that the pumpkin spice must flow. Kull Wahad!

The Pumpkin Spice must flow
The Pumpkin Spice Must Flow

Yes! Something resembling Autumn is upon us and, in America at least, ’tis the season when anything and everything will be available in Pumpkin Spice flavor. Oh joy 😐

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Go Juice!

Coffee – the dark and invigorating brew that fuels Americans every morning – could soon be providing energy to far more than just our bodies and minds. Engineers at the University of Nevada have proven that used coffee grounds can be effectively used as a source for both biodiesel and solid fuel pellets.

Details of their findings can be found here [PDF].

Every 1,000,000 pounds of coffee grounds can produce just slightly over 13,900 gallons of biodiesel and 847,600 lbs of solid fuel pellets. Since Starbucks generates an estimated 210,000,000 – yes, 210 million – pounds of spent coffee grounds per year in the US, the researchers at the University of Nevada believe that Starbucks could amount to 2,920,000 gallons of biodiesel and 89,000 tons of fuel pellets. This would represent just slightly less than 2.00% (1.986%) of the estimated 147,000,000,000 gallons of diesel fuel required by the US and Europe annually. Now that’s some go juice!

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