A special thanks to Blakkfrogg for this one:
“Hi honey. This is Daddy. Is Mommy near the phone?”
“No Daddy. She’s upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul.”
After a brief pause Daddy says, “But honey, you haven’t got an Uncle Paul.”
“Oh yes I do, and he’s upstairs in the room with Mommy right now.”
“Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do. Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door and shout to Mommy that Daddy’s car just pulled into the driveway.”
“Okay Daddy, just a minute.”
A few minutes later, the little girl comes back to the phone.
“I did it Daddy.”
“And what happened honey?”
“Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming.
Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser and now she isn’t moving at all!”
“Oh, my God! What about your Uncle Paul?”
“He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too. He was all scared, and he jumped out of the back window and into the swimming pool.But I guess he didn’t know that you took out the water last week to clean it. He hit the bottom of the pool, and I think he’s dead.”
Then Daddy says, “Swimming pool?” Is this 555-9600?”
OMGs, can you say “Oops!” Then again, justice often takes as winding path…