You Might Be A Floridian

jonolanEvery state in the nation has its own individual character and quirks of its residents that, in many ways, define what it is to be from that state. Florida, my home state, is very much not an exception to this rule.

It’s actually quite easy to tell a Floridian even when they’ve moved elsewhere in the country as I have long ago done.

You might be a Floridian if…

  • You think that socks are only for bowling
  • You never use an umbrella because the rain will be over in five minutes
  • Having it rain on only part of your car doesn’t freak you out
  • To you a good parking place has nothing to do with distance from the store but everything to do with shade
  • You can at a glance tell the difference between fire ant bites, mosquito bites, and noseeum bites
  • You know what a noseeum is
  • To you anything under 70 degrees is chilly
  • You’ve driven through Yeehaw Junction
  • You know that no grocery store can compare to Publix
  • You know that anything under Category 3 is worth waking up for
  • You dread love bug season
  • You know what a love bug is
  • You are on a first name basis with the Hurricane list. They aren’t Hurricane Charley or Hurricane Frances; to you they’re Andrew, Charley, Frances, Ivan, Jeanne, Wilma, Irene, Cheryl, Rita, Mary, Alison…
  • You know what a snowbird is and they’ll leave
  • You think that six-foot alligator is actually fairly average
  • To you “Down South” means Key West
  • You think flip-flops are everyday wear. Shoes are for business meeting and church, but you have worn flip-flops to church before
  • You have a drawer full of swimsuits and one sweatshirt
  • You get annoyed by tourists who feed the seagulls
  • You think a mountain is anything hill over 100′ above sea level
  • You know the four seasons are: hurricane season, love bug season, tourist season, and summer
  • You’ve hosted a hurricane party
  • You can pronounce Okeechobee, Kissimmee, Withlacoochie, Thonotosassa, and Micanopy
  • You know the other name for Rat Town
  • You understand why it’s better to have a friend with a boat than to have a boat yourself
  • You were 25 before you first met someone who couldn’t swim.
  • You’ve worn shorts and used the A/C on Christmas and News Years

I suppose there’s one other thing that would be evidence of being a Floridian. If you’re laughing, albeit a bit ruefully, at this bit of home state humor, you just might be a Floridian. :lol:

Related Reading:

Laughter Really Is The Best Medicine: America's Funniest Jokes, Stories, and Cartoons
Hyperbole and a Half: Unfortunate Situations, Flawed Coping Mechanisms, Mayhem, and Other Things That Happened
Fodor's Florida 2014 (Full-color Travel Guide)
Dad Is Fat
What If?: Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions

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3 Responses to “You Might Be A Floridian”

  1. ceefour Says:

    This one doesn’t know the other name for “Rat Town”

  2. jonolan Says:

    That would be either Orlando or Disney World, though it’s normally applied to Orlando as a whole or, at least, it was in my day.

  3. Ceefour Says:

    Oooooooh…of course…should have known…geriatric brain fade…..

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