Three Pints Please

An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. After he finishes them, he walks back to the bar and orders three more.

The barmaid approaches and tells him, “You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it; it would taste better if you bought one at a time.”

The Irishman replies, “Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, the other in Australia, and I’m here in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we’d drink this way to remember the days when we drank together. So I drinks one for each o’ me brothers and one for me self.”

The barmaid admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there. The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way: He orders three pints and drinks them in turn.

One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other regulars take notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the barmaid says, “I don’t want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss.”

The Irishman looks quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawns in his eye and he laughs. “Oh, no, everybody’s just fine,” He explains, “It’s just that me wife had us join that Baptist Church and I had to quit drinking. ‘Hasn’t affected me brothers a bit though.”

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12 Responses to “Three Pints Please”

  1. eeyore Says:

    HA! Ya gotta love the Irish

  2. Aafke Says:


  3. Christy Says:

    Love it.

  4. jonolan Says:

    Thank you, all. I”m glad you liked it; I know I did πŸ˜‰

  5. rtan89 Says:

    Haha. That’s great.

  6. HannahJ Says:

    That’s too funny! I dimly recall hearing a version of that long ago; if I weren’t reading this in the library I would be laughing my head off. (Then again, I may have a touch of Irish in me from dad; what’s wrong with laughing at yourself? Nothing!)

  7. jonolan Says:

    Yeah, it’s an old, old joke. Still good though.

  8. rayon soleil Says:

    LOL…nothing can stop him πŸ˜€
    he always have one good reason to drink!!!

    so refreshing to read… πŸ˜€

  9. Jack Ash Says:

    There’s nothing better than a wee nip!


  10. jonolan Says:

    Except for maybe another wee nip – one served by a buxom colleen.

  11. Irritable Elephant Says:


    I love this joke. We always have a big St. Patrick’s Day party at our house. Thanks for your comment on my fundraising efforts for St. Baldricks. Left the last post up there for some time because I wanted to draw attention to it.

    But I am back — and in rare form this morning.

    Take care.


  12. beltwaysnark Says:

    There’s never a bad time for a good drink.

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