Reflections From a Murky Pond

Below are nine points of comparison between Conservatives and Liberals in modern America. The nine points give a broad view of the differences in outlook between Conservatives and Liberals.

• If a Conservative doesn’t like guns, he doesn’t buy one.
• If a Liberal doesn’t like guns, he feels that no one should have one.

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• If a Conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn’t eat meat.
• If a Liberal is a vegetarian, he wants to ban all meat products for everyone.

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• If a Conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to defeat his enemy.
• If a Liberal sees a foreign threat, he wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good.

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• If a Conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
• If a Liberal is homosexual, he loudly demands legislated respect.

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• If a Black or Hispanic is Conservative, they see themselves as independently successful.
• If a Black or Hispanic is Liberal, they see themselves as victims in need of government protection.

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• If a Conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
• If a Liberal is down-and-out, he wonders who is going to take care of him.

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• If a Conservative doesn’t like a talk show host, he switches channels.
• If a Liberal doesn’t like a talk show host, he demands that those they don’t like be shut down.

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• If a Conservative is a non-believer, he doesn’t go to church.
• If a Liberal is non-believer, he wants any mention of God or religion silenced.

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• If a Conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for it, or may choose a job that provides it.
• If a Liberal decides he needs health care, he demands that the rest of us pay for his.

Yes, these comparisons are sarcastic and funny – at least to some people – they’re also disturbingly true.  It largely stems from Conservatives adhering to the American principles of self-determinism and personal responsibility while the Liberals adhere to the ideologies of Statism and Collectivism.